Shitty Captain
by Phoenixrin
Summary: And as Luffy scrapes off the last bit of food off the plate and Ussop tackles him from behind, Sanji realizes what he should have a long time ago. And he laughs. Ussop and Luffy look at him quizzically before joining in and behind her book, Robin smiles, relishing the moment. In which Sanji makes a little discovery. Platonic if you're not a fujoshi and SanLu if you are. Oneshot.


Hi guys! Remember me? It's Phoenixrin, ya know, that one teenage girl that wrote a fanfic a metaphorical decade ago. Well, college just started and my life is seeping back into 'shit is happening' phase. Well, here you go. Kindly review.

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Sanji wasn't sure what the case was with his captain. The kid pushed entire dishes down his throat with a speed second only to that of light. And that was saying something. For an inanimate existence, light did a pretty good job of winning against Luffy. Still, Sanji, for all that he had cooked in his life, could not fathom just _where_ all that food went. And Luffy remained as skinny as ever, not gaining even a layer of fat. Sanji was about to tear his hair out of curiosity when one day, out of the blue, Chopper burst out of his cabin with a look of triumph. He had then proceeded to tell everyone that he had _finally_ found out exactly _why_ and _how_ Luffy remained so skinny. Turns out that Sanji wasn't the only one curious, though Chopper had obviously researched the subject out of worry as the ship's one and only doctor.

Later, after Chopper has explained that since Luffy is rubber, he needs more energy than a normal human being just for existing, Sanji gets to work. He has meticulously worked out exactly how much Luffy needs to eat on a daily basis. And although it's a lot, it's nothing that Sanji can't manage. After all, he has been the sous chef at Baratie, where all kinds of people came and as long as they had the money, Sanji had the ability to serve all and any demands that his customers had. And that included being able to fill bottomless pits or black holes for stomachs.

While Sanji has always liked cooking (for his mother) ever since he was a child he never really reacted as strongly to starvation as he does now. The long days spent on that one rock in the middle of a vast ocean definitely changed the gravity of the word when it came to Sanji. Sure, he never took it lightly before, but nothing teaches a lesson quite like experience, right? However, there were times when Luffy demanded food even when he clearly wasn't hungry. That was probably because of his unexplainable love for meat. And as much as Sanji loved to cook, he wasn't exactly know to cook for someone who wasn't hungry for free, especially if they weren't of the opposite gender as him. Yet, for some reason, he always, _always_ cooked up something for Luffy. That baffled him to extents unknown to humanity.

He considered that it could be loyalty, or even obligation as the cook of the ship. That theory was shot down the next time Luffy barged in with a cry of 'Sanji! Meat!'.

And it just so happened that Robin was reading a book in the kitchen to keep him company.

She noticed every glance he threw towards his captain while he was cooking.

Damn.

She decided to speak up when the food was served and Luffy made himself busy.

"Humans emotions are strange existences, are they not, Cook-san?"

Both the males turned towards her, gaze questioning and heads tilted. Robin let out a light laugh.

"What I meant was that I originally thought that Cook-san, of all people, would recognize affection at first sight. I was clearly mistaken."

Luffy, not getting it in the slightest, dubbed it a mystery thing and continued shoveling food down his throat. Sanji, on the other side, had gone into his internal debate mode.

Sanji didn't get attached to people easily. Especially not idiots with brute strength. Given that he was attached to everyone in Baratie (though he'd willing die before admitting it), that was because he had spent a lot of time with them. Yeah. That's it. But Luffy… Luffy was _different_. Once you get to know him, you kinda get attached to him. As in those unbreakable sort of bonds.

And as Luffy scrapes off the last bit of food off the plate and Ussop tackles him from behind, Sanji realizes what he should have a long time ago. And he laughs. Ussop and Luffy look at him quizzically before joining in and behind her book, Robin smiles, relishing the moment.

He has never felt so pleasant before.

* * *

Well…. I was thinking that it would take Sanji a while to figure out that it was more than similar foolish dreams that bound them together, with Robin helping out, of course.

Yep.

And it took place around the time after Robin joined the crew, which is apparent in the way she addresses Sanji.

Thanks for reading!

Please drop a review!


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